


Swallow the Moon and the Stars

by zoeburchard



Category: The Goldfinch (2019), The Goldfinch - Donna Tartt
Genre: Cuddling, Cute, Drabble, M/M, Touching, Underage Drug Use, sharing a joint, soft, underage sex (implied)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:00:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27650360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zoeburchard/pseuds/zoeburchard
Summary: Vegas Era drabbleBoris and Theo share a joint then pass out together in bed.
Relationships: Theodore Decker/Boris Pavlikovsky
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	Swallow the Moon and the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be a longer story but it just sort of became a portrait of the two of them on a Vegas night getting high together. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Greasy dark curls tangled with sandy strands, longer than they’d ever been. Laid out by the pool looking up at the stars, tops of their heads touching, bodies splayed out in opposite directions on the still warm cement, Boris could tell that Theo was far away, deep within his own mind. After taking a deep drag on the joint they were sharing, Boris reached back over his head, fingers brushing across Theo’s lips giving him a turn.

“Boris.” His voice was soft and distant.

The taller boy slowly turned his head to the side noticing Theo’s outstretched arm, palm up as if he was giving himself up to the stars. Boris placed his hand on Theo’s, not holding on or interlacing fingers, just to be the grounding weight keeping him from floating away into the night. “Potter?”

Softly curling his fingers around Boris’, he ruminated, “Do you think when we die we become stars? We can’t just disappear right? Like, we have to become something else, go somewhere else.” He swallowed hard, “Do you believe in past lives, Boris? Or future lives? Reincarnation and shit?”

He turned his head back to the dark and twinkling sky, eyebrow twitching up at Theo’s peculiar train of thought, “Star is fucking giant ball of gas, Potter. You want to be giant ball of gas?” He smiled at the stars.

“Oh fuck off!” Theo sat up and took another drag of the joint. He faced towards Boris, legs bent, a hand supporting his weight behind him. Theo watched as Boris arched his back to look at him. Chest bare from their earlier swim, Theo saw the flesh of his stomach dip so far below his ribs, each of which was distinctly visible, that it might touch his spine. He wondered what it would be like to touch Boris’ spine, not in the playful way in which they frequently touched each other, but to really feel each bone beneath his fingers, to study him—that is until he realized he was staring. Not seeming to mind or even to have noticed, Boris looked to Theo’s lips then back to his eyes. Theo understood.

Putting the joint in between Boris’ lips, he waited while Boris took his turn, Theo’s hand softly falling across his friend’s cheek. Gratefully Boris took a drag before Theo took one more deep inhale before discarding it somewhere beside him. For a moment his eyes got lost in Boris’ hair as he leaned over, his elbows on his knees.

“You believe in past life?” Boris asked looking up at Theo again. Theo let his hand fall into Boris’ hair, twirling the curls around his fingertips. Head cocked to the side, he thought about it for a moment while watching each individual strand of black hair fall over his skin.

“This can’t be it, you know? I have to believe I’ll see her again some day. I want to see her so bad. This can’t be everything, right? There has to be more. There has to be.” He felt the heat rise in his cheeks before realizing he was maybe pulling on Boris’ hair a little harder than he had meant to. “Sorry…” He let his hands fall to the pavement.

The older boy reached his arms back beyond his head, stretching his body like a cat. Playfully he slapped Theo’s cheeks with both hands before sliding his hands down Theo’s arms to grab his hands and pull Theo overtop himself. Half lidded sleepy eyes looked up into Theo’s face as Boris put Theo’s hands on his chest and held them there. “Is fine, Potter. You know, you will see mother again someday but now— try to live. Life’s not so not worth living.”

Theo could feel Boris’ hot breath on his forehead and a fire under each palm. “Boris, that doesn’t make any sense. You should say ‘Life is worth living’.”

“Do you listen to what I’m saying or just correct my English? You understand, yes? So why correct?” He pulled Theo’s hands further down his chest making him stretch farther, bringing both boys physically closer.

As his hands moved over the pale skin littered with bruises, old and new, Theo swallowed hard. “Yeah, but you’ll never speak properly if I don’t correct you and you’ll always sound like the crazy Russian that you are.”

“Ukrainian— technically. But you like crazy, yah?”

Theo rolled his eyes. “Boris, this hurts. Let go.” Boris let go as he was bid, flipped over and leaned on his elbow to keep looking at Theo.

“Am tired, Potter, and stars are making head spin. Let’s go to bed.” Theo nodded lazily and pushed himself to his feet, reaching down and taking both of Boris’ hands in his own and pulling him to his feet as well. “Ah! Must not forget!” He grabbed the half empty bottle of vodka before following Theo through the glass door, Popchik at his heels.

-

“Potter, help! Am stuck!” Theo came out of the bathroom, having changed into his pajamas, to find Boris tangled in a shirt he was attempting to put on.

“You kidding, Boris? You can’t even put a fucking shirt on? How much did you—“ he saw the bottle of vodka that was half full when he had left for the bathroom 5 minutes ago, now completely empty. “Boris! You’re going to kill yourself!”

“No, no! Am not lightweight like you, Potter! Have strong blood, strong mind— not so strong arms.” His body moved in what probably would have been a classic Boris shrug. “Have made myself stuck.” He flailed around a little until Theo finally grabbed the shirt and pulled it over his head, throwing it to the ground, causing Boris to wobble and fall forward onto Theo, landing them both on the bed, the nothing weight of Boris feeling heavier than expected on top of Theo.

“Fuck! Boris, get off!” Theo half heartedly pushed at Boris, but he was dead weight and Theo was still high from the weed.

“Can not. Is not possible. Arms don’t work.” Boris laid his head on Theo’s shoulder and shut his eyes. Theo could see him out of the corner of his eye and pushed harder.

“No! Don’t sleep on me. Get off! It’s not my fault you drank all the vodka, you fucker!” But instead of getting off, Boris wrapped his arms around the small boy beneath him and nuzzled into his neck.

“Boris! If you’re going to smoother me, can we at least lay _on_ the bed instead of half off the bed? Fuck. Everything is spinning and the ceiling looks alive.” He held his head in his hand for a moment before curling an arm around Boris and pushing off the floor with his feet to try and get them further onto the bed. It wasn’t very successful. “A little help here?”

“Eh, Potter, you talk so much you sound like me.” The lanky boy pushed himself up on all fours, lifting Theo up and onto the bed so they were laying the correct direction and fully on the mattress rather than dangling off the edge. “Hush now, sleep.” With that he flopped back down, half on top of Theo, arm draped over his chest and around his back, face nuzzled in his neck.

“Glasses,” was all Theo had to say and Boris, with his unoccupied hand, plucked the glasses from Theo’s face and patted around until he felt the frames hit the nightstand. Weaving his fingers back into Boris’ hair he stared at the ceiling that appeared slightly less menacing than before. In the darkness he thought he could see stars, though they were indoors and that was logically impossible. Turning his eyes towards Boris, he studied his soft sleeping features before pressing his face against his friend’s forehead. The beat of Boris’ heart felt like a drum against his body, pounding at every point of contact. _Life was not so not worth living._ It was dumb, but Theo had liked how it sounded when Boris said it. Laying here with him, the two wrapped around each other, that was what made life worth living. The promise of his mother on the other side was tempting but then Boris would look at him, his big dark eyes, the devilish grin he’d give Theo before a particularly bad idea that would lead to a particularly memorable night- that was all worth staying in the land of the living.

In a moment of weakness, mind having been shut down, he kissed Boris on the forehead. He slid the hand that wasn’t in Boris’ hair up the thin arm that held him, over his shoulder and to his neck. The life force, the beating life force was so strong in his long pale neck and Theo desperately wanted that energy to beat with the same force inside him. Boris made him want to _live._ Cradling Boris even closer, he kissed his forehead once more.

Boris tilted his head up, surprising Theo, and caught him on the lips. Before Theo could even savor it, he pulled back pushing Boris away. The arm around Theo’s chest tightened. “Boris, what—“

“Theo.” The way he cocked his head, the way his tired eyes glanced straight into Theo, the curls that fell across his face and all the unsaid words hit the younger boy like a ton of bricks. Long cold fingers held Theo’s cheek far more gently than made sense for Boris. “ _Theo.”_

Boris brought their lips together once more, pressing his body into Theo’s as if they could not possibly get close enough. It only took Theo a moment to give in and sink into the softness of Boris’ lips against his. Theo rolled his body towards Boris, wrapping his arm around the thin boys waist. His head was cloudy, he had swallowed the stars on the ceiling and the light of them emanated from Boris’ skin. He licked Boris’ lips and Boris bit his playfully.

“Boris, I—“ Theo tried to speak but Boris kissed him again, pushing his hips down flat, climbing on top of his friend.

“Shh, Potter. Not tonight.” Hands braced on either side of Theo’s head they stared at each other for a moment. Theo’s eyes dropped down as his hands slowly found Boris’ shoulders. His fingers traced along the boy’s prominent collar bone causing Boris to suck in a sharp breath. His light touch drifted down the smooth white expanse of Boris’ chest, goose bumps arising in their wake. Moonlight shone through the window giving his black hair a blue halo. He was perfect and beautiful. _Not so not worth living._

His eyes met Boris’ once more as he slid a hand up into his curls, pulling Boris down on top of him, kissing his lips, his nose, his cheeks, his jaw- every part of him he could reach.


End file.
